Category Archives: legal writing

Dear Donald, a letter from Madame X

donald_ivanka_child_small

Dear Donald,

You may not remember me, but I was at Le Cirque one night, that December, when you were having sex with Marla & trying to get rid of poor Ivana. Remember your ski trip? I was there for that too! Isn’t life funny? Anyway, Ivana was still running the Plaza. You hadn’t destroyed it yet. Of course you would be instrumental in that, letting that fabulous, fabulous hotel where Scott & Zelda frolicked in the fountain — and where I & my daughters enjoyed many a Sunday brunch — get turned into condos (using nonunion labor, of course). Even then we knew what you were made of, and it was ticky-tacky.

You were a prematurely balding joke, you were getting soft & going broke, and your lovely, long-legged girl spoke to me — at length — while we were in the ladies’ together. She asked to borrow my lipstick. I’m a nice Southern girl, too, so like sorority sisters we joshed about the men we were with that night. We joshed about stuff like sex, and how it was really funny how men were so simple, so easily fooled. Turns out my mother knew her mother from way back!

I actually asked poor Marla what she thought of Trump Tower. One of my friends had tried to get me to go inside but I refused. It was too ugly, and you’d torn down that beautiful Art Deco facade & not even given it to the Metropolitan like you promised! I wish I’d known that night what you’d be up to in 2016, because I would have spit on your plate on my way out the door. I have good aim. I was a tomboy.

Anyway, back in the Le Cirque ladies’, Marla giggled and said she didn’t really like it much herself, but that she’d never tell you because she knew how much building that brass & glass dick substitute (her words, not mine) meant to you. Apparently insecurity knows no bounds. Plus, she thought you were rich. She played that gig pretty well, I must say.

I myself was there with my then-husband, a man who is on one of the Nobel Prize nominating committees. I was there while my then-husband & his boss discussed you at table. You were too busy grabbing Marla’s sweet little pussy under the table over in the corner to notice much else. So, while you pussy-grabbed, my then-husband & his boss regaled me & my then-husband’s boss’ wife (a tall, blonde doctor whose Polish-born mother had survived Auschwitz) with the rumors (all true) of your imminent financial demise.

You were also a complete laughingstock down in Palm Beach. All of old Palm Beach hated you! I’d heard how you were ruining Mar-a-Lago — which I’d visited as a child, playing happily out in the garden whilst the grownups did boring things inside which didn’t involve roses, or butterflies, or dogs. You destroyed it, just like you destroyed that beautiful Art Deco facade. And, by the way, I know all about Jared’s brother. And your youngest kid.

So you thought being President of the United States would be easy? Cry me a fucking river, Herr Blotus. I know exactly who you are. You’re that pudgy asshole crybaby who got sent to military school for beating up the little kids. You’re that fat old man who cut off his nephew’s health insurance because he didn’t like the way his nephew refused to bow & scrape to him after he stole his nephew’s inheritance. Honestly, sir, you are nothing more than a piece of shit.

Sincerely,
Madame X

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Shitler’s Apologist-in-Chief

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Shitler’s Apologist-in-Chief

In 2009, when President Obama’s approval poll numbers were high, Kellyanne C. wrote an article for humanevents.com which dismissed approval polls. She said such polls were nothing more than a polite nod of the head. She said they didn’t mean much.

Kellyann C. in 2009: President Obama’s “adulation abroad and a perception of charm and charisma at home is not a mandate for the type of sweeping transformations to the domestic economy and foreign policy currently on the table. After all, Candidate Obama ran on ‘change we can believe in,’ not ‘revolution you must pay for.’”

And this morning, in 2017, on CNN? She utterly dismissed Shitler’s current critics because, “frankly, their approval ratings are half of his.”

Apparently, approval polls are either informative or meaningless depending on who’s writing Kellyanne C.’s paychecks. She is the calmest liar I have ever seen. She must load up on benzos before each interview. She can barely keep her eyes open.

If President Obama had no “mandate” for “sweeping transformations,” what, then, does Shitler have?

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Proposed Articles of Impeachment of Donald J. Trump for Treason

impeachment-proceedings-ticket-august-1974

February 17, 2017 (Friday, all fucking day)

Oy. The presser. Draft the articles of impeachment, ASAP, Gilligan. I’ll go over them when you’re done.

Proposed Articles of Impeachment (as drafted by Kimberly Townsend Palmer)

RESOLVED, that Donald J. Trump, President of the United States, is hereby impeached for high crimes and misdemeanors, and the following articles of impeachment are to be exhibited to the Senate:

ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT EXHIBITED BY THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA IN THE NAME OF ITSELF AND OF ALL OF THE PEOPLE OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AGAINST DONALD J. TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, IN MAINTENANCE AND SUPPORT OF HIS IMPEACHMENT AGAINST HIM FOR HIGH CRIMES AND MISDEMEANORS.

ARTICLE 1

Donald J. Trump, in his conduct of the office of President of the United States, in violation of his constitutional oath faithfully to execute the office of President of the United States and, to the best of his ability, preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States, and in violation of his constitutional duty to take care that the laws be faithfully executed, has committed treason and prevented, obstructed, and impeded the administration of justice, in that:

Donald J. Trump, personally and through his close subordinates and agents, has committed treason by maintaining covert and unlawful contact with agents of Russia.

Donald J. Trump, personally and through his close subordinates and agents, has committed treason by providing covert and unlawful aid and comfort to agents of Russia.

Donald J. Trump, personally and through his close subordinates and agents, has committed treason by receiving covert and unlawful aid and comfort from agents of Russia.

ARTICLE 2

Subsequent thereto, Donald J. Trump, using the powers of his high office, has engaged personally and through his close subordinates and agents, in a course of conduct or plan designed to delay, impede, and obstruct the investigation of his treasonous acts; to cover up, conceal and protect his treasonous acts and the acts of his close subordinates and agents; and to conceal the existence and scope of his other covert and unlawful activities.

ARTICLE 3

The means being used to implement Donald J. Trump’s treason include one or more of the following:

1 making false or misleading statements to lawfully authorized investigative officers and employees of the United States;

2 withholding relevant and material evidence or information from lawfully authorized investigative officers and employees of the United States;

3 approving, condoning, acquiescing in, and counseling witnesses with respect to the giving of false or misleading statements to lawfully authorized investigative officers and employees of the United States and false or misleading testimony in duly instituted judicial and congressional proceedings;

4 interfering or endeavoring to interfere with the conduct of investigations by the Department of Justice of the United States, the Federal Bureau of Investigation of the United States, the Central Intelligence Agency of the United States, the National Security Council of the United States, the Department of Homeland Security of the United States, and Congressional Committees of the United States;

5 approving, condoning, and acquiescing in, the surreptitious payment of substantial sums of money for the purpose of obtaining the silence or influencing the testimony of witnesses, potential witnesses or individuals who participated in such traitorous acts;

6 making or causing to be made false or misleading public statements for the purpose of deceiving the people of the United States into believing that he had no involvement in such traitorous acts: or

7 endeavoring to cause prospective defendants, or individuals duly tried and convicted, to expect favored treatment and consideration in return for their silence or false testimony, or rewarding individuals for their silence or false testimony.

In all of this, Donald J. Trump has acted in a manner contrary to his trust as President and subversive of constitutional government, to the great prejudice of the cause of law and justice and to the manifest injury of the people of the United States.

Wherefore, Donald J. Trump, by his conduct, warrants impeachment and trial, and removal from office.

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How Art Thou Received? (a prayer for refugees)

How Art Thou Received? (a prayer for refugees)

Imagine: suddenly, without warning (because that is how war arrives) you are a war refugee! Simply running away from being murdered. And how are you received when you can finally stop running, when you are out of range of the guns, the bombs, the blood? No countries to take you. No one to feed you. You are a skeletal pawn in a skeletal game.

Embalmed corpses declare war on the living and fight for their “territory” against other embalmed corpses using armies of young people; embalmed corpses feeding on fresh, young blood.

I know something is very wrong, somewhere. It must be addressed, and addressed properly. Our prayer, our incantation, our spell to heal, must be more powerfully crafted, more distilled, more essential, than was the horrid spell we are trying to break: a tradition of might over right, strong but wrong, a spell of ignorance which has caused so much harm, and is trying to do more… powered by the love of power, the love of control over people.

The scarred parts of the heart can be replenished; the broken parts, glued; the weak parts, strengthened; the fear assuaged, the pain relieved. But the desire to change, to truly alchemize oneself, spin that straw into gold… the gold of the sun… the silver of the stars… the red planet… the North Star… primal navigation by looking not at the ground, but by looking up, to the sky… that kind of desire doesn’t visit often.

If you want to know where you are going, be sure your map is accurate, or at least doesn’t kill you. Migrating birds know this. Power & Liberation. Slave & free. Joy & Suffering. High & low.

Craving slaves, some are trying to roll us back to serfdom, only they can use our own science & technology to rape us! Serfdom: tied by birth to land. You are a pawn, a source of income; in thrall to your Lord and Master. Freeing serfs is always a struggle. Brute force arm-wrestles the human race, and brute force often pins people to the mat, but… you cannot keep people down for long. The oppressed will continue to spring up and defend their inalienable human rights. All people are created equal: including our ancestors, who existed long before the self-anointed first “private property” owners. Human beings are endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights, yes? The earth cannot belong to any one of us. Period. We own this planet. All of us.

 

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Opening editorial message for Truth, the magazine, 1st draft

illustration truth the magazine opening editorial statement

Opening editorial message for Truth, the magazine, 1st draft:

First off, my name is not really Kimberly Townsend Palmer. It is, or rather, should be, Kimberly Townsend Pomikala. Pomikala is a Bohemian name, which my father was born with but which was changed by his family not too long after he started school in Arcadia, California. It was changed because one fine, sunny day he came home in tears after being called a “dirty Bohunk” by the other children. It was 1943, and the world, and finally the United States, had long been at war. The biggest battles were not being fought on battlefields but being fought inside the human heart. Many families lost their entire physical existence, multiple generations snuffed out in less time than it takes to inhale, exhale — mine lost only its identity. A small price to pay for being safe in southern California, in a town named for the residence of the Greek gods. So my father grew up as a camouflaged ethnic. The name was changed, but the inside could not be changed. He never felt at home anywhere he went. He might well have been a war refugee of a metaphysical battle — a battle, the fundamental struggle humanity has been waging since its inception, the inexorable war between truth and ignorance. Factual accuracy is not always the truth — truth goes to the essence of a thing. Not the surface, but what is deep within.

The story is told how Eve caused the fall of humanity from the garden of Eden by eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. What is the remedy for this? What is the essential nugget of truth we may take away from that crucial moment? My answer is: there is no absolute good, there is no absolute evil — there is but truth and ignorance. Eating the apple and gaining the surface knowledge of good and evil was a trap humanity fell into, a trap we have been struggling to release ourselves from ever since. Love exists. Hate exists. Both can serve the truth. Both can serve ignorance. We must harness ourselves to the wagon of truth and pull our heavy burden to wherever the driver leads us. The driver is God, the driver is love, the driver is peace, serenity and acceptance of the way things are on this planet. Many things we label good and many things we label evil are in fact neither. They are simply in the service of truth or in the service of ignorance. Satan, in the guise of the serpent, led Eve and Adam into a terrible, incomprehensible trap and God is now and has always been guiding humanity out of that trap. The reason God forbade eating of that fruit was it was not yet the right time for humanity to have that knowledge.

Plainly put, we are not yet advanced enough to receive the knowledge of good and evil. God is the only entity qualified to eat of that tree. We have taken a small, superficial bite of knowledge and used our imperfect bodies, minds and hearts to inflict merciless cruelty and oppression on others. Our biggest enemy is pride — believing we, as fragile, physical and temporal beings, can ever know enough to accurately judge another’s worth before God. How dare judges and juries impose the death penalty! It is not our role to take life, which is bestowed by God. It is our role to live it and seek the truth and banish ignorance. We are entitled to keep ourselves safe, we can ensure our physical and emotional safety from injustice and repression — but we cannot ever presume to know the will of God.

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president barack obama is being quoted out of context by the radical fringe right, and I’M SICK & FUCKING TIRED OF THIS SHIT

illustration president obama

the full text of president obama’s speech in which he advocates FOR democracy, not AGAINST it. a paragraph is being circulated, ENTIRELY OUT OF CONTEXT, to defame him. I WON’T STAND FOR THIS SHIT.

“And it was here in Europe, through centuries of struggle, through war and enlightenment, repression and revolution, that a particular set of ideals began to emerge, the belief that through conscience and free will, each of us has the right to live as we choose, the belief that power is derived from the consent of the governed and that laws and institutions should be established to protect that understanding.

And those ideas eventually inspired a band of colonialists across an ocean, and they wrote them into the founding documents that still guide America today, including the simple truth that all men, and women, are created equal.

But those ideals have also been tested, here in Europe and around the world. Those ideals have often been threatened by an older, more traditional view of power. This alternative vision argues that ordinary men and women are too small-minded to govern their own affairs, that order and progress can only come when individuals surrender their rights to an all-powerful sovereign. Often this alternative vision roots itself in the notion that by virtue of race or faith or ethnicity, some are inherently superior to others and that individual identity must be defined by us versus them, or that national greatness must flow not by what people stand for, but what they are against.

In so many ways, the history of Europe in the 20th century represented the ongoing clash of these two sets of ideas, both within nations and among nations. The advance of industry and technology outpaced our ability to resolve our differences peacefully. And even — even among the most civilized of societies on the surface, we saw a descent into barbarism.”

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Bill Whittle (William Alfred Whittle), “PJTV” ultra-right-wing, neocon “media darling”… owes the government a BUNCH of money! he always did expect the world owed him a living… hypocrisy in the Corporate States of Amerka has been brewing for a long, long time. Since Ronald Wilson Reagan, good old “666,” as we used to call him!

illustration bill whittle tax deadbeat

RECORD 1

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20101300981 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William              Case Number:   20101300981

Filing Type:        County Tax Lien              Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20100915           Amount Liability:            $93.00

Address:             12611 Pacific Ave #102  City:      Los Angeles

State:    Ca          Zip:        90066

Plaintiff:              County Of Los Angeles   Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      County Tax Lien

RECORD 2

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 199033123 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William              Case Number:   199033123

Filing Type:        Federal Tax Lien – Income           Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         19901200           Amount Liability:            $25,922.00

Address:             12659 Rd 36       City:      Madera

State:    Ca          Zip:        93637

Plaintiff:              Usa Irs  Court Code:       Ca173

Court Name:      Merced County, Merced Recorders Office           Unlawful Detainer:            N

RECORD 3

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 2003854138 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William              Case Number:   2003854138

Filing Type:        Federal Tax Lien – Income           Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         19950200           Amount Liability:            $26,422.00

Address:             12659 Rd 36       City:      Madera

State:    Ca          Zip:        93637

Plaintiff:              Usa Irs  Court Code:       Ca173

Court Name:      Merced County, Merced Recorders Office           Unlawful Detainer:            N

RECORD 4

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 199126935 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William              Case Number:   199126935

Filing Type:        Federal Tax Lien – Income           Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         19911000           Amount Liability:            $50,217.00

Address:             3765 W Mckinley            City:      Fresno

State:    Ca          Zip:        93722

Plaintiff:              Usa Irs  Court Code:       Ca173

Court Name:      Merced County, Merced Recorders Office           Unlawful Detainer:            N

RECORD 5

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 2003323754 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William              Case Number:   2003323754

Filing Type:        Eviction With $ Amount Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20060629           Amount Liability:            $812.00

Address:             8405 Rio San Diego Dr Apt 5114 City:      San Diego

State:    Ca          Zip:        92108

Plaintiff:              Sares Regis Holdings Inc              Court Code:       Ca235

Unlawful Detainer:         Y

RECORD 6

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20080584715 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William A          Case Number:   20080584715

Filing Type:        Federal Tax Lien              Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20080404           Amount Liability:            $14,149.00

Address:             12611 Pacific Av #102    City:      Los Angeles

State:    Ca          Zip:        90066

Plaintiff:              Internal Revenue Service             Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      Federal Tax Lien

RECORD 7

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20090343392 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William A          Case Number:   20090343392

Filing Type:        State Tax Lien    Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20090311           Amount Liability:            $6,784.00

Address:             12611 Pacific Av #102    City:      Los Angeles

State:    Ca          Zip:        90066

Plaintiff:              State Of California          Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      State Tax Lien

RECORD 8

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20101659997 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William A          Case Number:   20101659997

Filing Type:        County Tax Lien              Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20101118           Amount Liability:            $3,859.00

Address:             12611 Pacific Av #102    City:      Los Angeles

State:    Ca          Zip:        90066

Plaintiff:              County Of Los Angeles   Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      County Tax Lien

RECORD 9

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20110604035 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William A          Case Number:   20110604035

Filing Type:        Federal Tax Lien Release             Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20080404           Amount Liability:            $14,149.00

Address:             12611 Pacific Av #102    City:      Los Angeles

State:    Ca          Zip:        90066

Plaintiff:              Internal Revenue Service             Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      Federal Tax Lien

RECORD 10

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20110604673 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William A          Case Number:   20110604673

Filing Type:        State Tax Lien Release   Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20090311           Amount Liability:            $6,784.00

Address:             12611 Pacific Av #102    City:      Los Angeles

State:    Ca          Zip:        90066

Plaintiff:              State Of California          Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      State Tax Lien

RECORD 11

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20110671881 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William A          Case Number:   20110671881

Filing Type:        Federal Tax Lien Release             Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20101118           Amount Liability:            $3,859.00

Address:             12611 Pacific Av #102    City:      Los Angeles

State:    Ca          Zip:        90066

Plaintiff:              Internal Revenue Service             Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      Federal Tax Lien

RECORD 12

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 2003C009034 844 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William A          Case Number:   2003C009034 844

Filing Type:        Civil Judgment   Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20000700           Amount Liability:            $6,379.00

Address:             3765 Mckinley W            City:      Fresno

State:    Ca          Zip:        93722

Plaintiff:              Intl Cr   Court Code:       Ca059

Court Name:      Fresno County, Fresno Municipal Court Unlawful Detainer:              N

RECORD 13

CIVIL RECORD VERIFICATION: CONFIRM CASE # 20100007635 AT THE COURT HOUSE

Defendant:        Whittle, William J           Case Number:   20100007635

Filing Type:        State Tax Lien    Entity Type:       Individual Record

Filing Date:         20100105           Amount Liability:            $4,949.00

Address:             4267 Marina City Dr #504            City:      Marina Del Rey

State:    Ca          Zip:        90292

Plaintiff:              State Of California          Court Code:       Calosc1

Court Name:      La County / Recorder Of Deeds Action Type:      State Tax Lien

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